Live Through This

Chapter Nine: Laika

The rain began to pour down on them a mere hour after Konni and Starlight had finished creating the shelter, and didn't let up for a full day and night. As far as shelters went, it was pretty poor. Little more than a roof cobbled together out of bedrolls and emergency blankets, but it kept them mostly dry. They all huddled together on hastily tanned cat skins around the fire and sipped hot caf with a dash of revnog. She and Eyes had created a patrol schedule but besides that, no one ventured into the rain. They just stayed put and watched the lightning flash outside.

There wasn't a silent moment. Despite the terrible weather and the horrible situation they found themselves in, they were in good spirits. Rest and Relaxation was rare to come by, so they had to take it while they could. Starlight and Boots fashioned themselves clothes out of their tanned furs, and made Konni a pair of earring out of the Long Cat's teeth. Sawbones told stories that Konni always felt the impulse to one-up. Sleen and Iggy got creative cooking the meat with plants from the jungle. They were doing as well as they possibly could be, given their current state.

Konni was grateful, and was proud that the small crew she'd managed do keep alive were doing so well. But there was a horrible truth to all of this as she realized that they were all handling it better than she was. Her fuck ups, her fatal mistakes, she couldn't swallow them and continue to lead. She'd been running on empty for weeks and believed so strongly that no one could blame her for her shortcomings as she pressed on towards the end game. But why was she worried about blame? Why was she worried about herself, at all?

It was sickening, it was juvenile. Oh, poor Konni, doesn't have time for her Padawan. Can't rest, can't think. Failure will prove that she's been given impossible odds. Success will only come from suffering through those impossible odds and never reevaluating what you have to work with. She hated herself so fiercely. She was overwhelmed with grief and that felt selfish, too. Hops died and there was nothing she could do about it. She wanted to wallow, to cry. To let his death, and the death of all the others, be the final blow in this mission.

Or she could try to look at her situation from new angles. Being frustrated with Starlight was getting her nowhere. Starlight was going through hell, too. Pulling her troops along behind her instead of with her wasn't working anymore. Maybe this could be a fresh start. Maybe she and Eyes could take advantage of their opportunity to create a work ethic without any precedent. Maybe she could learn how to be a General.

This whole war felt so pointless.

She tried, though. As the rain pounded down and they huddled under the shelter she found a corner where she could sit with Eyes uninterrupted and make plans. Actual plans. While they couldn't all trek on towards the monastery, and certainly couldn't take out any more than a squad of B-1's on their own, they could send a scout ahead to see what they were up against, and they could send another backwards into short-distance comm range. This made actual sense, something she'd given up on days ago. It was embarrassing.

A Jedi Shadow was assumed to be as capable martially as any other Jedi, but she was beginning to understand that Master Lani had been right about her. She needed to learn cooperation. Peace. Clear thought. Deadly strength wasn't enough.

The middle of a war was a bad time to learn how to be a General, but it was better than never learning at all. Konni didn't exactly feel optimistic, but she did feel like this momentary reprieve was granting her the chance to gather all the horrible loose threads of herself and weave them into something useful. They planned, they healed their wounds, they discussed the way forward as a group. Konni was beginning to feel like she had a handle on it all.

Until reinforcements showed up.

The rain had ended at some point in the night, and Konni awoke gently to the sky turning purple at the edges and the sound of water dripping from vines. The air around her face and lekku was cold, but she was warm under her cloak and skins with Starlight pressed into one side of her and Boots on the other. The fire was already crackling and as she glanced over she saw Kyramla, Eyes, and Iggy already sitting around it heating up rainwater for morning caf.

She slipped out from between her friend and her Padawan, pulled her cloak tight around herself, and silently joined those seated around the fire. Kyramla and Iggy were having a quiet conversation about hunting some birds, and Eyes was leaning back with his helmet on, which typically meant he was reading. He removed the helmet as Konni sat down and passed her a cup of caf.

"Sleep good?" he asked, locating his own cup.

"Not bad," she said, "after I eat I'm going to check on Sawbones. You wanna do a perimeter check?"

"Already done."

"Perfect, I think were—"

Something was approaching.

"Konni?"

"Wait."

Several somethings. Konni's first thought was animals, more angry animals that wanted them off their planet. It was certainly something organic she was feeling. Not droids. But then. Something familiar. Sentients. Reinforcements. And she knew one of them.

Konni got up and walked towards the edge of the hill they were atop. Below she could see them, skirting the edge of the river that had appeared overnight. Two Jedi, and at least twenty clones. They had medical supplies, surely, and food. The weight on Konni's shoulders lifted and she breathed deeply. Sawbones could be saved. They all could.

She hadn't even noticed Eyes standing behind her until he shouted back towards camp, "reinforcements!"

Kyramla and Iggy were running down hill in an instant to meet up with the party, while everyone still asleep began sitting up.

"Worth the wait?" Eyes said, turning to her, a big grin in his face. It was nice to see.

She was relieved, truly. But she knew who the reinforcements were. This was going to take the newfound wind out of her sails.

Starlight appeared between Konni and Eyes and peered down the hill at the group coming closer. "Master, is that Laika?"

"Yeah," Konni said, staring straight ahead at the figure moving towards them. Of course it was Laika. Of course it was. Out of all living Jedi, she knew the fourth moon of Wrarí the best, having lived in the monastery for two years. Who else would they send? Konni had considered the possibility, but decided it wouldn't be Laika but she'd been told reinforcements were the closest Jedi cruiser. Obviously, something had changed.

She missed Laika, but Laika didn't miss her. She felt a pang of longing as she looked down at her black hair and tan robes cutting through the ferns. There was too much history between them to dig up during such vital work. This was going to be strange and likely pretty stupid.

When Laika, her Padawan, and their troopers reached the top of the hill there was palpable relief in everyone. Laika dropped her bag and closed the distance between the two of them, her face neutral as if they were just colleagues. "General Nafai," Laika said with a slight bow of her head. General Nafai. So that's how she wanted to play this.

"General Jowanna," Konni returned, crossing her arms and then quickly uncrossing them. She didn't need to radiate contempt so outwardly. She knew Laika could feel it and there was nothing she could do about that, but no one else needed to know. Eyes had seen though, and raised one of his brows.

Laika looked the same as she did the last time Konni saw her. Thin, tan, hooded dark eyes and wild black hair. She didn't wear any armor, just the standard Jedi robes. Her typical floor-length skirt was gone though, replaced with billowy pants that cinched at the ankle. Her hair was full of leaves and twigs, unsuccessfully pulled into a high bun. Konni wanted to pluck the debris from her hair, but then remembered that Laika hated her.

"We're glad to have found you. We feared the worst. This jungle can be treacherous," Laika said, as she ushered her Padawan forward. "Have you met my apprentice?"

He was a human boy in his late teens or early twenties with the classic, tragic Padawan haircut. Laika had the same back when they had first met, on this very moon. It looked better on him. "Gori Aumar, nice to meet you," he waved and bowed a little.

"I see Apprentice Starlight is still with you," Laika said, peering behind Konni to where Starlight stood, expressionless, dressed in cat furs.

"What's happening in Stanoi?" Konni asked, not caring about pleasantries.

"CIS troops landed just before your reinforcements, General Mouk and the 611th held them at bay, and called for guidance. They sent me, since apparently no one else knows what's happening here."

"And you do?" This came from Eyes.

"It's the cosaris."

"The what?" Konni asked.

"Cosaris. It's a mineral. Rare. This moon has a higher than average concentration. The monastery is built on top of a cosaris mine."

"How do you know this. How do the Seps know this?"

Laika gave Konni a patronizing look. "I know this because I lived here and studied the geology of this moon. Cosaris is highly conductive and can be used to create power sources. How the Separatists know this, we don't know. The Wrari don't export cosaris; it's sacred to them. None of the existing mines are operational."

"So they're here to strip-mine the planet, basically."

"Basically." Laika agreed.

"So obviously we need to blockade the moon. If they want this stuff, they won't just leave."

"Obviously that is already happening. We're permanently occupying the moon. An outpost in Stanoi is being set up as we speak, that's part of what General Mouk is here for."

Now that surprised Konni. This system was remote. There wasn't any need to drag these people any further into the war. Did they get a say? Did they have any input? Defending them was one thing, but setting up a permanent military base was another. The Wrari didn't typically care for outside influence, despite being a republic world. It was funny how quickly this was decided, before the city even had a chance to be rebuilt.

"Permanently occupying?" Konni spluttered, "The Wrari can't be okay with that, and you should know better than anyone that—"

"They don't have much of a choice, General," Laika said, placating hand raised before her, "it's either occupation or let the CIS roll through with nothing to stop them. We tried having one contingent here to root out the problem and, well," Laika swept her eyes over the camp.

Konni rolled her eyes. "This is unreal."

"My thoughts exactly," Laika said, scanning the crowd of troopers, "wheres your Commander?"

Eyes raised a hand, "here."

Laika looked at him skeptically, his standard issue armor, his lax stance. "Field promotion?"

"Yes, Sir."

"You'll want to speak with Commander Nines. We have an optimized route to the monastery, and a recon plan."

Konni wanted to say, we also have those things, but she bit her tongue. She expected Eyes to walk away just then, to find Laika's Commander, but he looked to her. "In a moment," she said as a way of dismissing Laika's assumption that she could order around other people's troops. "What, exactly, is the mission objective now? Clearly a lot has happened since I last had contact with Command. My orders were to secure the city and investigate what had happened to the Jedi at the monastery."

"That last part still stands. We still haven't been able to reestablish contact with the Jedi there."

"We ran into droids in the Jungle, trajectory would suggest they came from the monastery."

Laika looked behind her, and waved forward her Commander, who had been talking with some of the troops. "Map, please, Commander Nines."

Nines projected a holo of the route, and then focused in on the area around the monastery. "There's a ridge here," he said, gloved finger floating in the blue light, "We'll stage here and send scouts into the valley around the monastery to assess the CIS occupation, if that is indeed what is happening."

"Sounds like a plan," Eyes said.

"I'll get my men to assist in breaking down your camp. We've wasted enough time. We should move out." Laika finalized her statement with a stiff little nod as Nines switched off the map. The both of them turned and left then, leaving Konni standing there with Eyes and Starlight feeling like someone just slapped her.

"Some history there, Sir?" Eyes asked.

"Too much," Konni mumbled. "Lets get everything packed up. I'm sick of this place."